Mumbles. My mumbles. I mumble a lot.

So I woke up at 4:30 am yesterday. Pretty unusual, sahur is usually at 5, and I usually need waking up. As if given a shock, my head immediately went into thinking mode. Continuing to sleep was definitely out of the issue.

I could really be mean and cruel to myself. Usually the one dragging myself down would be me alone, demotivating my spirits, extinguishing my flames. Though who would wonder.

Try feeling as if you've lost hope, confidence, sense of direction, and confidantes one by one. You lose people to talk to, and ultimately you start questioning things you shouldn't be questioning yourself. You start hitting yourself on the head pretty often, then.

I really wonder if I should go into hiding and be a hermit, again. Somehow I don't think that resolves matter, not anymore anyways.